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Torino
Advanced Driver

when driving an old foreign car

please place the following items to bring in order of importance : vice grips ( locking pliers),sporty tweed cap,  aspirin (or other headache reliever), mobile phone, chewing gum (aluminum wrapped lucas electrical equipped cars), duct tape, extra fluids, tow truck, choice add one other item. 

32 REPLIES 32
Guitar74
Gearhead

Hilarious.

NITRO450EXP
Instructor

Matches, so when it breaks down for the 1000's time you can burn it to the ground and collect the insurance, specific answer for Hagerty's amusement.

Nitro 😉
Torino
Advanced Driver

your answer ' matches' is slightly amusing. the addition of a disclaimer ( driver on closed closed course, do not attempt, not legal in any state, do not set your car on fire, do not commit insurance fraud ) adds that subtle bit of whit that 'makes it'. my compliments sir.

WRLotus
Detailer

Tools ?

Rescue ?

Piffle ! 

All one needs is a Drive at Dawn hat and a sense of adventure.

 

20200919_153035.jpg

Torino
Advanced Driver

true enough but that stuff next to your garage door looks likes it's propped up a little too precariously for my liking. next to that beautiful Lotus? you must have a big brass pair or amazing stacking skills.

WRLotus
Detailer

No danger to the car - just a carefully stacked pile of junk plus, at the top, a central vacuum canister that is firmly attached to the wall. But thanks for reminding me that I need to make a trip to the scrapyard to get rid of some stuff that has been sitting for so long that it kind of blends into the background and disappears. One of the advantages(?) of a very small car is that it allows more room for stuff to accumulate in the garage.

 

And to fess up, there is a bag of basic tools in the nose of the Europa. The good news is that it has been untouched for few years and might have rusted into a single lump of metal by now.  

Torino
Advanced Driver

to fess up. you know i was being facetious. the Europa is one of my favorite cars period.i just love them. give me a street legal go kart any day. just one question,big valve or twin cam? i'm guessing big valve. but since you're going to the scrap/junk yard,think you could then park a super 7 in there too?

WRLotus
Detailer

@Torino , answering your question isn't as simple as you think. The Europa has a twin cam engine with a "Big Valve" cam cover on it but the specific model is the Europa Twin Cam with the 4-speed transmission. Most sources say that the big valve engine didn't go into the Europa until the Europa Special with the 5-speed box. I wasn't astute enough to confirm the engine specifics when I bought the car way back in 1977 and I didn't keep actual specs from times the cylinder head has been off since then. The head will be coming off again some time this winter and I will be curious enough to confirm things then but I suspect it is a small valve engine with a fancy cam cover.  

 

I like your suggestion of fitting a Lotus 7 into the garage but not likely to happen. I already have two Lotus companions for the Europa - an Esprit and an Elise and if another Lotus follows me home I'll have to factor in the cost of a divorce. Besides, I took the Europa back to its off-site parking this afternoon so now the Elise is parked beside the pile of junk. 

Torino
Advanced Driver

see now i didn't know that. i guess you do learn something new every day.may i make a suggestion. since the europa is off location tell your wife you sold it. clean out the garage find a caterham 7 that someone hasn't finished for cheap - ' all the parts should be there' and soldier on with the mods you wouldn't do to an original (loose the big 7 grille please). the mrs's will be fine with it - "he's in the garage playing with that box of parts he bought. i don't care it keeps him happy' - then bring the europa back. if she's accepted 3 whats one more? on my end it sure is fun spending other peoples money. (ps) wasn't elise the name of colin chapmans daughter too?

WRLotus
Detailer

Sound advice. I will keep it in mind.

 

To be a bit pedantic, the Elise is named after the granddaughter of Romano Artioli who was chairman of Bugatti Industries when it owned Group Lotus in the '90s. Bugatti sold Lotus to Malaysian interests before VW acquired Bugatti.

 

Elisa was only 2 when the car was introduced so an early production car was set aside and kept for her. Last I heard she still has it and now dries it around Berlin.

Torino
Advanced Driver

not at all, i asked the question. and elisa artoli kind of brings things full circle. 'what to bring when driving an old foreign car?'- the (other) answer i was looking for was european fashion model / actress. to those members of the fairer sex your favorite male sex pot is acceptable ( vapid bimbos included) and will be given due consideration. please choose by year make and model. for example: 75 lancia stratos -claudia cardinale. in the case of your lotus europa there is only one correct answer, diana rigg needless to say.  

WRLotus
Detailer

One can but dream - and perhaps Barbara Bach as a suitable Bond girl riding shotgun in the Esprit.

 

To return to the original question about travelling in an older foreign car, I will be heading off on a four day car on Friday. Driving the Esprit, destination unknown. I will dutifully have a kit of basic tools and replacement fluids in the car and my wife in the passenger seat. Reality lands with a dull thud.

Torino
Advanced Driver

if that's your reality,and i have no reason to assume it's not, then you are truly a fortunate man.don't mean to bother you but....the esprit... details...i'd have a hard time picking one, if i could pick one. enjoy the trip. my favorite destinations were largely the result of detours along the way.

WRLotus
Detailer

Yes, that is my reality. And I am quite aware that I have much to be thankful for and little, other than a facetious comment about bringing a Bond girl, to complain about. Not that anyone would listen to me anyway.

The upcoming trip is a group drive (scaled back for the Covid world) where we don't get any route info for the day until we meet each morning. It's put on by a restoration shop that does mostly street rods and muscle cars so our European ride will be in the minority. I've been on their events before and expect lots of time for side trips. Looking forward to it and I might be tiresome and post a couple of pics when we get back.

WRLotus
Detailer

A quick follow up to my last post. 

 

Got back today from a 4 day, 1600 km. (~1000 mile) tour around parts of BC driving the only foreign car in a group of 16 cars. It's a '97 Lotus Esprit so not exactly ancient but well out of warranty. I did pack up a basic kit of tools but the only time I had to use one was to remove a small stone that had become thoroughly wedged in one of the headlight pods of the pop-up lights. 

 

A couple of pics just to show I was there.

20200925_152334.jpg

 

20200928_091120.jpg

Torino
Advanced Driver

s4? i don't know well enough. love them all for different reasons. if forced to choose....got to go v8 only because i have this inexplicable fascination with flat plane engine layouts. maybe someone should start a club.

WRLotus
Detailer

It's a V8. Flat plane crank with dealer installed "sport" exhaust - one of the world's worst cars for sneaking up on people.

Torino
Advanced Driver

yea but halloweens coming and the kids trick or treating could use a good scare. so that makes the esprit a 'multipurpose' vehicle. you lucky bugger. 

TeutonicScot
Intermediate Driver

@WRLotus,

Being pedantic myself, but if you're in Canada touring, isn't all that Detroit iron travelling with you "foreign"?

Torino
Advanced Driver

you aint from around these parts are you son

TeutonicScot
Intermediate Driver

Sure am amico, Torino.

Torino
Advanced Driver

hit the  'c' accidentally or...

TeutonicScot
Intermediate Driver

Torino........it's Italian.....as is Torino.

WRLotus
Detailer

I don't know if I want to get back into this after the last exchange, but, @TeutonicScot , you have a point. The Lotus was the only trans-Atlantic vehicle it can be left aside for now. I'm not getting into a discussion of where the constituent parts were made other than to say that when I took the centre high-mount brake light out of the rear wing of the Lotus, I noticed that the plastic housing has "BUICK" embossed in it. 

 

There were two Beaumonts on the trip so I guess that counts as domestic Canadian production. 

 

That leaves 12 pieces of Detroit iron. Other than the three Corvettes, I don't know the history of North American car manufacturing well enough to hazard a guess as to which assembly plants put them together but let's accept them as having been made in the USA.

 

On that basis, the only mechanical problem that befell an "old foreign car" was a leaking heater core in a '67 Camaro. 

TeutonicScot
Intermediate Driver

@WRLotus 

Ah, no harm intended, all in good fun. In any event, it looks like you had a great time and isn't that really what it was all about?

Beautiful Europa and Esprit. Love the pictures.

WRLotus
Detailer

All good fun. The best part part will the next time I see the owner of the '67 Camaro and get to ask him why he drives an old foreign car. 

Torino
Advanced Driver

so i'm driving an italian import? hmmm... who'd of thunk it

Torino
Advanced Driver

 additionally ' all in good fun' hah! i beg to differ sir. you are a cad! pistols at ten paces tomorrow high noon. bring your second. and with that i say good day to you sir!.....i said good day. 

WRLotus
Detailer

A challenge to a duel raises some serious questions.

 

Will the two of your be wearing your exclusive, and oh-so-fashionable, Hagerty Duel at Dawn hats?

 

Will you be reliant on an old foreign car to transport you to the appointed field?

 

You have challenged a Cad to a duel. In a worst case that he merely sustains a serious wound, are you willing to administer the coupe de grace ville to a Cad? 

Torino
Advanced Driver

 i offer you the honor of officiating. i will be consulting my haberdasher needless to say and bringing the bentley of course.i always shoot to kill. also be stopping by the dunkin donuts on the way. anybody want me to get them something? coffee a boston creme maybe? 

Spuds
Advanced Driver

If you dont have pics it didnt happen.

hyperv6
Engineer

You just need a cell phone for the flat bed. 

Odds are even if you find wants is wrong there are parts available close to where you broke down.