A Conversation With the Author's Great-Granddaughter*, Wherein Your Narrator Considers His Life Among Internal Combustibles and Also Eats Too Many Snacks *This great-granddaughter does not currently exist. My two children are now six and eight. The following conversation is set six or seven decades after present day and imagines this fictional descendant around high-school age. https://www.hagerty.com/media/opinion/smithology/smithology-the-flame-fuel-was-fun/
Classic device: the protagonist and a foil character. I think of King Lear and his Fool, for example. The Fool has more fun, like the Great-Great-Granddaughter here, mocking the oldster. She echoes the Fool's best line: "Thou should have been wise before thou hadst been old." Yep, Mr. Sam, you and Bill Shakespeare, brothers by another mother, or something like that.
Contrarian opinion, but this is the worst thing you've ever written. Everytime a point is being made, it trips over idiot slapstick, falls on its face, and changes the subject. I hope I don't end up a blithering idiot who can't make a single coherant point when I'm old, but I sure as hell don't want to read about it. Only an opinion, your a badass writer, don't stop what your doing.